


Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off

by CreampuffedHollstein



Category: Once Upon A Time - Fandom, swan queen - Fandom
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-17
Updated: 2012-11-17
Packaged: 2017-11-18 21:48:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/565648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CreampuffedHollstein/pseuds/CreampuffedHollstein
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Emma convinces Regina to go to a bar with her and have a few drinks. She finds out exactly why Regina never drinks anything more than her own apple cider.<br/>I really just wrote this one for fun. Wanted to attempt humor.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tequila Makes Her Clothes Fall Off

"No! Absolutely not! No!" Regina protested, waving her hands for affect.

Emma jutted her bottom lip out, giving her best puppy dog eyes. Regina refused to look at her, knowing that if she saw those eyes look at her like that, she'd give in. It was so very Henry of her. They both had a way of getting to her with just a certain look on their faces. Regina shook her head, turning her back on Emma, refusing still to look at her.

"No, no, no! I refuse. I am NOT going out to a bar with you just to drink tequila. We have alcohol here, Emma. We don't have to go out to do it. Not to mention what everyone would say if they saw us out together." Regina was definitely not going for this, which of course Emma knew she wouldn't.

Emma sighed and rolled her eyes, coming up behind Regina and wrapping her arms around the woman's waist. Regina went rigid for a moment, clearly pissed and not wanting to be touched, but as soon as Emma put her mouth close to her ear, she relaxed a bit.

"Come on Regina. Going out with me won't be that bad. And who cares what everyone else thinks. It'll just be two women at a bar. Big deal."

Regina began shaking her head again, turning around to face Emma now.

"I care. I don't need the town running their mouths about me. And I need to keep a professional appearance. Going out to a bar with you does not coincide with being professional."

Regina raised an eyebrow, stepping out of Emma's embrace and folding her arms.

"No."The tone of her voice was firm, but Emma knew she was wearing her down.

A wicked smile crawled its way across Emma's lips and she took her own step back, shrugging.

"Alright, well, if you don't wanna go, that's fine. I'll just go by myself."

One more shrug and Emma turned around, heading out of the kitchen and towards the door.

"Wait! What?"

The sound of a seriously pissed off, but bewildered Regina stopped Emma, but she had to stifle her laugh and make her smile go away before she turned around. Sucking in a breath, she turned around when she successfully wipe the smile off her face.

"What? You won't go with me and I would really like to go out tonight, have a little fun. I realize you're afraid of what people will think if they see you out with me, so I'll just let you have a nice quiet time at home and I'll go out and find my own fun."

Emma stared at Regina with her head tilted a little and her lips pursed just a little. Regina stared back at her with wide eyes, mouth agape.

"You…you'd go out without me?" Regina asked, apparently not having been prepared for Emma deciding to go out by herself. Emma shrugged.

"Well, what do you want me to do Regina? You refuse to let anyone know about us…about…whatever is going on between us. And I haven't been out in a while, so I'm going out whether you come with me or not. Simple as that."

With those words, Emma turned back around, nearly reaching the front door when she heard Regina's heels clicking loudly on the floor. Her hand had just reached for the doorknob when her name hit her ears.

"Emma…wait."

Emma didn't move, just stood with her hand on the doorknob, smile on her face. She was winning this one. She was the only one who could win against Regina.

"Fine. I'll go with you. Just…let me put something else on okay?"

Regina sounded defeated, but she at least she didn't sound angry anymore. Emma turned around and nodded.

"Alright. But hurry up."

She gave Regina a small smile before the woman nodded and disappeared upstairs.

* * *

Moments later, as Emma lounged in a chair in Regina's office, Regina reappeared and stood in the doorway, devilish smile on her lips. Emma lifted herself from the chair before looking up at Regina. When she finally did, she wished she was still sitting in the chair because her knees went completely week. Emma's green eyes widened as she took in Regina's appearance. She wasn't in her usual Mayoral attire. Oh no, this was far…sexier. Not that she didn't like what Regina usually wore. She wore everything with finesse. Black leather pants, black knee length boots that added a few inches to her height and a tight blazer with specks of red that had a neckline that dipped pretty damn low. Lower than anything she'd ever seen Regina wear. In fact, she wasn't even aware that Regina owned a shirt like that. Emma mouth went dry and she tried to swallow a few times, but failed. She couldn't even get any words to come out of her mouth. Regina gave a wicked smirk and tilted her head.

"Well, by the reaction I'm going to assume you like it?"

Regina gave a chuckle and walked further into the room, placing her hands on Emma's hips and leaning in for a kiss to the lips. Emma barely responded, obviously too shocked, her brain having malfunctioned for a moment. Just before Regina was going to pull away, Emma finally came back to life and placed a kiss on Regina's lips that took both of their breaths away. Regina chuckled and licked her lips, still tasting Emma's lips on hers.

"Like would be a complete understatement. I fucking love it."

Regina rolled her eyes at Emma's words and shook her head.

"Your language can be so crude sometimes."

Emma chuckled as well and shrugged her shoulders. She did this quite often, a trait of Emma's that Regina had become quite accustomed to.

"It gets my point across though. And I couldn't not say it that way. I mean…damn! You look amazing!"

There was a hint of pure lust lingering in Emma's eyes and Regina knew what was going on in Emma's mind just by seeing that look there. As if on cue, Emma stepped towards her and leaned in for another hot kiss. Regina cut her off though and put her hand up.

"Uh huh! No!" Regina shook her head for millionth time tonight. "If we start this now, we're never getting out of here. And you're the one who wanted to go out. So let's go."

With that, Regina made her way for the door, grabbing her keys and purse on the way out. Emma followed her in a near trance, eyes glued to Regina's ass the whole time. She couldn't deny how good those leathers made Regina's butt look. It was like she had died and gone to heaven. They were halfway to Regina's car when Regina stopped and turned around. There was a smile on her lips and her eyebrow was raised.

"Your eyes are burning a hole in my leathers dear. Try to keep your eyes elsewhere when we're in public dear."

Regina gave a wink and then a smile, turning to make her way to her car again.

"I'm driving by the way. We're not showing up in the hideous car of yours."

Regina gave a visible shutter and Emma finally snapped out of her trance. She frowned at Regina's insult about her car as she reached for the handle on Regina's car.

"Hey! That car has been good to me. Don't bash it."

Emma's lips were pursed into a tight line. Why did everyone hate on her car all the time? She personally loved the thing.

"Bash it is exactly what I would like to do." Regina mumbled as she turned her car on and headed down the road to the only bar in town.

Emma barely heard what Regina said, frown lines growing deeper on her mouth. She let it go though, knowing that it took a special person to appreciate her car. Instead she reclined in the seat and watched Regina for most of the ride there. She had tried to make a few efforts to rub Regina's thigh or cop a few feels, but Regina had her serious face on as she drove, lecturing Emma about how if she fooled around with her while driving they could wreck. Emma mumbled a few times about Regina not being any fun, but Regina didn't respond, just smirked and kept her eyes on the road.

It didn't take very long for them to reach the bar. The flashing neon sign was hideous to Regina, but she said nothing as she parked the car and turned it off. Emma proceeded to get out of the car, but stopped when Regina didn't move. Emma sighed and sat back in the seat, looking over at Regina with a frown.

"What's the matter?" Emma asked, eyebrows raised.

Regina was silent for a moment, not moving a muscle, not even blinking. She finally looked over at Emma and she saw the worry in Regina's eyes. There was something else though. A warning? Yes, a warning in her eyes. Emma was about to speak but Regina put her hand up to stop her and spoke first.

"I need to tell you something first, before we go in." She paused, looking down and the back into Emma's, all serious and rigid.

"Do not let me drink too much. Especially tequila. Things…happen…when I've had too much tequila." Her voice was as serious as the look on her face, but there was a hint of a demand in it as well. Emma nodded her head, but was wondering just exactly what it was that happened when Regina had too much to drink.

"I'm serious Emma. There's no telling what might happen if I have too much." Regina paused, but only for a moment, lips pursed for a minute.

"I'm going to drink a little, so I won't look so rigid and out of place. But…for the love of whatever higher power there is, do NOT let me drink too much."

Emma threw up her hands and nodded again.

"Alright, alright! You got it! Not too much!"

Emma rolled her eyes. She didn't say she promised though because she was desperately curious as to what Regina would actually do. She knew it was probably a bad idea to not do what Regina so desperately wanted her to do, but she couldn't pass this up. Finally Regina nodded and gave a small smile.

"Good. Now let's go in and…have fun."

Regina faltered a bit on the last two words. She had never been to this bar, had never really drank in front of the citizens of her town. She knew this was probably a bad idea and she blamed Emma Swan for this. Damn her for showing up in her town, damn her for barging her way into her life, damn her for making her do things she never thought she would. Damn her for everything really. Emma Swan had completely turned Regina's life upside down and what made her the angriest about it was the fact that she loved it. Of course, Regina would never admit this to anyone, especially Emma.

Both women were out of the car and headed towards the bar a few seconds later. There were people outside staring at them, most gaping at Regina. It was obvious that it was a surprise to see they're 'rule with an iron fist' Mayor at the bar. And with Emma Swan of all people, who everyone knew she hated. They stepped inside and were greeted with the same surprised stares, eyes wide and mouths agape. Regina narrowed her eyes and turned, only slightly, back to Emma.

"I knew this was a bad idea. I'm leaving."

Regina turned all the way around to leave and even took a few steps forward, but Emma stopped her by grabbing her wrist and pulling her back.

"No. You're not leaving. Just come in, have a drink, let everyone get used to the fact that you're here. It's gonna be fine. Trust me."

Emma gave her a large smile and those eyes again. Those damn eyes. Regina sighed, closed her eyes for a moment, trying to put herself together. When she opened her eyes again, she gave a small smile back to Emma and took her arm back gently.

"Okay. I'll stay…" Regina paused, eyes narrowing just for a moment, eyes darkening with all her seriousness.

"But if this turns out badly. I'm blaming you for it. And you will not like the punishment." Regina gave a satisfied smile then before heading off to the bar.

Emma stared at her for a moment before following, shaking her head. She soon dawned a smile though and waved at a few people. She had been in here before, but never with Regina. She was getting a few looks that said 'What the hell are you doing', but she just kept smiling and nodding before she sat down on the stool next to Regina. When she looked over, Regina was already downing a shot of tequila. Emma stared, a large smile spread across her lips. Regina looked over at her and rolled her eyes.

"Oh shut up. It's not like I haven't had alcohol before." One more eye roll and Regina was asking for another shot. Emma laughed and asked for the same.

"Hold up woman! I gotta catch up!"

Emma chuckled, downing two before Regina reached for her third. It wasn't long before Emma had about six or seven shots, but it wasn't effecting her too much just yet. Emma could hold her liquor and very well. However, she couldn't say the same for Regina. Regina had had just as much as she did and was already swaying a bit, acting a little differently. She was smiling more and getting a little touchy with Emma.

"I'm so glad I came with you tonight!"

Emma laughed, shaking her head as Regina practically hollered at her. People were watching, eyeing the Mayor as if she had two heads. Obviously no one knew Regina had the audacity to get drunk.

"Another…two, three, four… please Mr. Bartender sir!"

Regina flung out her arms dramatically and then tapped the table as the words fell from her mouth. Emma decided she would stop and just let the show play out, the widest of smiles dancing on her lips. The bartender slid two more tequila shots in front of Regina and the woman looked so happy, like she was about to cry. She leaned forward and pat the guy on the shoulder a few times, though it almost looked more like slapping.

"Thank you SO much! You're SO nice!"

More hollering. The bartender just turned around and headed down to the other end of the bar, serving others. Emma let out a loud laugh. It was interesting seeing Regina this way. In fact, she had to admit she rather liked it. It was good to see Regina smiling and having a good time. The woman very rarely let loose, unless it was in the comfort of her own room of course. Emma had had many a night with Regina where she let loose, bodies naked and covered in a sheen of sweat from their…exercising. Regina breezed through about four more drinks, but in the process of those four, Regina had managed to take her earrings off and slam them on the table. Emma grabbed them and shoved them in her pocket, making sure they wouldn't be lost. After the earrings were her shoes. She slipped those off and made her way into the dancing crowd. Emma had been drug into the crowd with her, but she wasn't about to protest. She had always wanted to dance with Regina. And boy did Regina dance. It wasn't the kind she was expecting, but it did go along with the music.

Fast paced songs played one after the other, Regina grinding herself against Emma which gained stares from every damn person in the room. The whole town was going to be gossiping about this, Emma knew that and she was probably going to get killed for letting Regina get so out of hand. She was sure she'd hear it in the morning, but for not she was just going to enjoy it and bask in the sunny disposition of the Mayor for one night. More grinding continued, Regina sliding against Emma in a very sexual manor, large smile on her face and laughter erupting. Some time during one of the songs, a few of the Mayor's buttons on her shirt managed to come undone. This showed her black, lacy bra, which Emma very much approved of. This time she made sure though that she was the only one getting a good view of that. There were plenty of men trying to stare, but Emma just shot them a death glare.

After a while, a slow song finally came on and Regina flung her arms around Emma's neck, surprising her. Emma let out a breath and put her hands on Regina's hips. Oh yeah, definitely rumors going around town for a while after this. Emma swayed to the slow pace of the music, Regina giggling every now and then. After a moment, Regina laid her head on Emma's shoulder, still giggling.

"This is soooo nice. So very nice. I like dancing with you, Emmmaaaa!"

An eruption of giggles started after that, making Emma laugh just a little herself. She shook her head and dragged Regina back to the bar and sat her down after the song was over. She eyed Regina, still baffled that Regina could act this way. She was even more surprised that Regina couldn't really hold much alcohol. Emma could have sworn she'd be able to, considering what Regina's apple cider was like. Hell, it had even put Emma out a few times after downing one glass, but not Regina. Perhaps tequila was some kind of weakness or something. Either way, this was all very amusing. Emma turned for a moment to ask for some water, but when she turned around she had to do a spit take. Regina had her bra off, somehow with her shit still on, and was swinging it over her head. Regina caught Emma's eyes, winked, giggled and began to holler.

"WHO WANTS IT?"

Regina propelled it around her head some more before slinging it off into the crowd. Emma didn't see who caught it, but right now it didn't really matter. She stared at Regina, eyes wide. Regina looked back to her and leaned forward, their lips almost touching. Emma could smell the tequila on her breath. Regina placed a finger on Emma's lip and then ran her finger down over Emma's neck and stopped in the middle of her cleavage. Emma was stunned, to say the least. So maybe this had been an idea. She was so dead for this in the morning.

"Emma! Emma! Emmmaaaaa! Hey!" Even more giggles now as Regina tilted her head back. She kept saying Emma's name, apparently liking the sound of it.

"EMMA! You know what? I like you. You're so preeetttyyy! All that beautiful…gold…stuff on your head! And not to mention you look damn hot naked too!"

Emma's mouth fell open and she could feel her cheeks getting hot, blushing hard. She could also feel everyone's eyes on them. The air had been sucked out of the room as soon as they heard what Regina said. The secret was out now. Emma closed her eyes and squeezed at the bridge of her nose. When she opened her eyes, Regina was reaching for the button on her leather pants.

"OOOOOO! Speaking of naked! Let's get naked right now Emma! These pants are so tight. Off! Offffff! Now!"

Emma wasn't sure she was talking to her or herself. She swallowed, staring at Regina for a moment before stilling the woman's hands.

"Uh, no Regina. Not here. You can't get naked here. It's a public place. I'd have to arrest you for indecent exposure."

At that Regina burst into laughter, struggling against Emma's hold to get back to her pants. She began to struggle, which in turn made Emma picked her up and sling her over her shoulder.

"Time to go home. Right now!" Emma said, carrying Regina out the door.

"Awww! Party pooooooper!"

At that word Regina burst into more laughter, Emma sighing as she carried Regina all the way back to her car. She plopped Regina into the passenger seat and closed the door, running to the drivers side and hopping in. The whole way back to Regina's home, Regina was trying to get Emma naked. She had to keep swatting the woman's hands away. She barely got her out of the car and to the door step, Regina struggling and reaching for Emma's pants. When she set her down, holding her to keep her up straight, Regina gave her a pouty look, bottom lip jutting out.

"Stop it, Regina. You're not taking my clothes off out here. I just wanna get you inside the house and on something comfortable."

Regina blinked and huffed, folding her arms.

"Fine. Fine. Get the door open….party pooper." A few giggles escaped, but not like the giggles that had happened earlier.

Emma had to help Regina up the stairs, Regina nearly falling and hitting her head on every step. She rolled her eyes and finally opted to just carry Regina up the stairs.

"Oh my! How nice! My brave knight in…hard, shiny….stuff….that covers your important parts!"

Emma had to laugh at that, shaking her head. She finally got Regina into the bedroom, just throwing the woman onto the bed. That would usually make Regina mad, but not tonight. She had flung her arms out and acted like she was flying.

"Wheeeeeeee!"

Her breath cut off when she hit the bed, but soon that was followed with laughter when she got her breath back. A moment later, Emma was being assaulted. Regina's hands were everywhere, first on Emma and then on herself. She nearly ripped the shirt off and threw it to the floor. She reached for Emma's shirt again after that, struggling to get it off. Finally after a moment of struggling, Regina huffed and fell back onto the bed.

"Take your clothes off…now! I want you naked. I want me naked. I want us both naked at the same time…if you know what I mean."

She tried to pull off a sexy voice, even wiggled her eyebrows, but it came off as funny to Emma. So she laughed and rolled her eyes, taking her clothes off as the lady wanted. After that, it was a night of drunk ecstasy. Emma had to admit that Regina had a way of still pleasing her to the fullest, even while drunk. Oddly enough it was the only thing she didn't miss a beat while full if alcohol. If she were to admit it, though she never would out loud, it was some of the best sex she'd ever had. Of course, one hundred percent of the time their sex was amazing. The way Regina had used her tongue on her, dipping into her wetness and circling it around her sensitive bundle of nerves. Multiple orgasms had hit her and hit her hard. Emma of course returned the favor, giving Regina orgasms of her own. It seemed Regina was a screamer when she was drunk. Good thing Henry wasn't home.

* * *

The next morning, Emma woke up, sun shining in through the window and practically blinding her. When she was finally able to really open her eyes, she gazed around the room. Clothes were strung everywhere, blankets were on the floor. When she looked over at Regina, she was tangled in a cover and had her arms wrapped around a pillow. A few minutes later, Regina stirred. She was quite for a moment, but then suddenly she sat up, hand flying to her head.

"Owwww!" She called out, eyes still closed.

For a moment it didn't seem much registered with her, but when her eyes opened and she turned her head just a little, Emma could see everything registering in her mind just from the way the expressions flitted across her face. Suddenly, she quickly turned her gaze to Emma and her lips pursed and her eyes turned into slits.

"Damn you, Emma Swan! DAMN YOU!"

Regina's tone told her that she was livid, her face was even turning red she was so mad. Or maybe it was from the liquor. Emma flinched, but a smile quickly appeared and she began to laugh, holding her stomach as she fell back onto the bed.

"Shut up! Shut up right now! I swear I am going to KILL YOU!"

Apparently she remembered. Which was a feat considering how drunk she had been. Regina got up from the bed, wrapping the sheet around her body. She stomped out of the room and to her bathroom. She returned a moment later with a glass of water in her hand and some pills in the other. Regina threw two of them at Emma, but kept the water, downing the pills and drink it all for herself. Emma just laughed and dry swallowed the pills, pulling a pillow over her head. She heard and felt Regina move, obviously lying back down.

"This is all your fault you know."

Emma chuckled and shrugged.

"I know, but you can't tell me you didn't have fun."

There was silence for a long moment. There was movement again and after another moment, Emma pulled the pillow off of her face. When she opened her eyes and turned her head, Regina was right there beside her. She could have sworn she would see Regina trying to kill her with her eyes, but instead Regina was smiling. Emma blinked, obviously surprised.

"I did have fun actually. Not to mention the sex was great."

Regina smiled, leaning in to give a light kiss to Emma's mouth. This was so out of character for Regina, but of course it didn't last long. Regina was frowning again, eyes hard and cold as they usually were.

"But I am going to get you back for this. And it's going to happen when you least expect it."

One more death glare and Regina nodded. A few seconds later she laid back down, closing her eyes tight.

"For now though, I'm going to lay here until my headache goes away. Go make coffee."

It wasn't a question, it was an order. Emma chuckled just once more before kissing Regina's shoulder and getting up to throw on a shirt and panties, practically skipping downstairs. It did worry her what Regina would do to get her back, but for now she was just happy making coffee for the woman upstairs that she was certain she was falling in love with.


End file.
